The Captain fell out of my shopping bag!

Oh yes. I am melodramatic. Super melodramatic at times. I could only stay out of here for -counts- precisely 12 days. And I made it seem like 'now I'll be back only when am 40 and have 10 kids all screaming over the place'...

Anyway,

You know, sometimes you wish for a lot of things? This that this that...and in the back of your mind who have this tiny voice chanting 'You'r never going to get it you'r never going to get it you'r never going to get it' ? Happens to me all the time. Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and thought about your life? It is just so random, but I think the most when I am waiting at railway stations. I see those 'eeeewwww' type men and wonder what it would be like to be married to them? Repulsive. And then I look at the lives of these glitzy and glamoury people.

Anyway,

The mother is extremely worried for the daughter. The mother really thinks I have lost my mind. Like the mother randomly calls me and questions me about random things. And when I throw up a confused look on my face, the mother goes "See See (to anyone / everyone / no-one who is present in the room) I told you she has been acting odd...I don't know what to do!"

Anyway,

Now my neighbor's rectangle faced baby has gotten herself a walker. So, she's drunk and driving all over the place in her 'vehicle'. And she got herself a haircut and watches spongebob and has a hot red coloured swimsuit and is now on her first ever vacation to GOA! I mean which baby has her first ever outing in frigging GOA in summer. She is already a 'cool' baby!

Anyway,

We'r now called 'Such a Cow' ! yay! I woke up one fine day (oh and after this special appearance by the lovely ladiej K-ay in the why-dont-I-blog-anymore deep thinking session) and realized that my blog depressed me. I don't care anymore if / if not the boring captain of the famous Titanic cried or made love or watched a soap opera before he died. I want to be mean and I want to be mean and therefore to everyone who visits me and my hot blog, I'll say, "Such a cow!" Oh i have no idea what it means, but well, it sure does sound like something mean and bitchy teeeheee!

So, Such-a-cow is back with loads of colourful hearts that are meant to hurt your eyes and hypnotize you...falalalalalaaaa

*Plays some Arabian music*

*Everybody starts belly dancing*

*Punk Camels start break dancing*

*Starts throwing refrigerators at the crowd*

Don't you love Meeeeeeeee?

I lost my way. I drew a map. I found another planet. I'm not coming back.

And when I place those fingers on the tabs, I want words to flow. Thoughts to speak themselves out. Moments to be captured and images to form. People to come alive, right there. Something tragic to happen. Not war, maybe a murder or something. damn, I have nothing to talk about otherwise.

I want to do something reeeeeeeeeally evil and bad and mean. And it doesn't stop at I 'want' to. I am going to. The only joke is, I do not know what to do. Dear happy sunshiny life, please let some evil happen.

I am such a cow. Or maybe a cat. I wish to be called a big fat Hippo.

No man, i ain't quitting blogging. You can't get that lucky. Else who will fling refrigerators at you?

Just GO, will you?

If the purple sky broke into tears, it'd rain blackcurrant berries.

I wish to become a globetrotter. Somebody pay for my travel expenses and get me a column I could write for a newspaper sharing my travel experiences and earn crisp green paisa. This sounds the best thing to do. Then why aren't all of us 'globetrotters' ?

He tweets like his tweets are going to be read out in the Parliament. Either you tell him or I will.

You could die the very next moment. Did you know that? It is so so so weird.

They'r kids. They talk like adults. I'm an adult. I don't even have to say the next thing.

One thing I detest the most. When kids (technically anyone younger to you) do/talk/live a life that is way more 'cooler' than yours. Gadgets / language / Boyfriends / girlfriends / everything included.

You know what sums it up the best? FML.

Oh it rained in Bangalore. I miss that place. My hometown it bees. Louly place it bees. Helps me put on weight. Pwetty place. May it become the capital of the world.

\One for those streets/

From Start to End...

He belonged to those streets alone...

Home or no home...

He needed a wall...

To paint his thoughts on...

Forever it'd stay, till broken bricks washed it away.

Nothing special about this one, just that i kept mixing one colour in the other...some new colours i found!

Love!

Chronicles of the missing dustbin cover.

Saturday morning. My morning. Lazy morning. Yawn-y morning. the morning when the cover of my dustbin went missing.

Okay I love dustbins. I think they have maximum utility and they look cute. Like tiny and cute and compact. Mine is grey in colour. It has always been grey in colour. It is our family dustbin, like been there since God alone knows how many decades now. I like to dump things in it. Makes me feel content and makes the room feel clean.

Okay so like in every normal apartment block in Bbay, we place our beloved dustbin outside our apt for the sweeper to collect the trash every morning. I don't like the other dustbins on our floor though. I woke up this morning and did what my brain is processed to do, place the dustbin outside. And then...then tragedy struck my beloved dustbin.

In the noon when my maid came in, like always, she sauntered in with the dustbin, oh my beloved dustbin, but, the dustbin MINUS the cover. The dustbin minus its lid. Its head. A vital part of it. Imagine you walk into your house without your head one day? I screamed. I wanted to cry. But, maid's here. Had to keep emotions under check. So no crying. Maid is one woman who doesn't think unless she's requested to. So, she din't notice genocide in broad daylight. Who dare steal my dustbin cover, I got thinking. Someone buzzed me on my cell-phone. Okay dustbin issue can wait, I said.

Maid does all her work and walks out. 3 hours later, I am glued to the television set, watching NewSouthWales bash the shit out of Victoria, drooling at those 11+2 cuuuuuute men on field, maid knocks the door. I frown, I go open the door. OMG. She's got the head of the dustbin in her hand. All in one piece.

Maid: It was there, lying on the last floor.

Me: Oh? Ya ya!! The dustbin had lost its lid...I remember.... =/

Maid: People are a bit cracked, in your apartment.

Me: Yes? I live here too, bytheway.

Maid: Be careful. they flung one of my chappals away last time.

Me: Really? Sad. Okay. Bye? Yes bye.

I got back at those cuties on television.

Now, since my blogger window is open and I got nothing to write and yet want to write, I decide to pen down the chronicle of the missing dustbin cover. Who must have thrown it away? you think. I don't know half those people in my apartment. Strange, they know me not either. And i'v stayed here for 18 years, apparently. Kids I tell you, they hate me. Cause I keep screaming at them. To shut up. I don't want to know about their plans of playing CID CID. But, hiding my dustbin cover to get back at me? really? What makes them think I'll be bothered? Kids I tell you...

Maybe I would'v been bothered if I had something for one of these guys who stays in my apt block...I would have gone searching for my dustbin cover then, you know, like...err, YOU KNOW =D

Whatever, that lid is back and here we have a Happy Ending =)

AND, my blogpost for today.

Much love for reading it!!

oRange* wants you to know this about ME!

i'v been tagged by oRange*

(btw, do people bother reading tags???)

Boom here I go!

1. What is your current obsession?

I'v been Googling these random *CUUUUUUTE* guy models out =D

eg: Marcus Hedbrandh, Marlon Teixeira (girls, CHECK!!!)

2. What are you wearing today?

A red *Tantra* tee and Blue PJ's!!

3. What’s for dinner/lunch?
Mommzzy made *methi ke parathe* and some awesome dal...plus having lunch with Mom so I am all ^_^

4. What’s the last thing you bought?
2 tee's and 2 flippers (that are bitting me BAD :'( )

5. What are you listening to right now?
Afterglow-INXS. LISTEN to it if you havent!

6. What do you think about the person who tagged you?
She's very oRangy and I think we'll have a ball bitching about people who'r not-like-us ;)

7. If you could have a house totally paid for, fully furnished anywhere in the world, where would you like it to be?

AUSTRALIA!

8. What are your must-have pieces for summer?
I don't care as long as I get a vacation for summer :|

9. If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go?

Australia. without a doubt.

10. Which language do you want to learn?

Kannada, that happens to be my mother tongue.

11. What’s your favourite quote?

CHANGE. Forget the quote. I love the word.

12. Who do you want to meet right now?

Sera Samantha Ramsey, my best faaavvvv friend who's in UK :/

Michael Clarke would be just as fine...or my local Cute guy??

Anybody listening???

13. What is your favourite colour?

Black.

14. Give us 3 styling tips that work for you.

Wear not what everybody wears. Eg: *screams* SHORTS.

Say no to jing bling jarring stuff that makes you look like a Christmas tree.

Cotton is the way to go.Comfy and chick.

15. What is your dream job?

To work for this jazzzy uber funny cool the-in-thing magazine and wear the awesomest class stuff ever to work =D

16. What’s your favorite magazine?

Talk about magazines :/ lol i dont read magazines !!!

17. If you had $100 now, what would you spend it on?

*SHOP*!!! Clothes, clothes, clothes, clothes, clothes, clothes, shoes and bags in that order.

18. What do you consider a fashion faux pas?

Bell-bottom embroidered pants?

19. Who according to you is the most over-rated style icon?

I was never really into people who make style statements cause they are c.o.n.v.e.n.t.i.o.n.a.l which is one thing i h.a.t.e

20. What kind of haircut do you prefer?

Short. with a fringe. Looooooove boy-cuts!

21. What are you going to do after this?

Sleep?

22. What are your favourite movies?

I can watch ANY movie. Chick flicks, cry flicks, angry flicks, *dishum dishum* flicks, though dubbed flicks are my faaaavvvv :P

23. What inspires you?

The thought that I am nowhere close to being awesome and envied!

24. What do your friends call you most commonly?

Shreya! One calls me Bozo, the other calls me Chere Amour !!

25. Would you prefer coffee or tea?

Both are fine! whichever costs lesser =P

26. What do you do when you are feeling low or terribly depressed?

I whine. My playlist goes on. I stalk raaaaaaaaaandom people i dont even know on Facebook and laugh at their pictures :)

27. What makes you go wild?

I already am when in my element and when with MY kinda species.

28. Which other blogs do you love visiting?

If i comment on your blog means I like visiting it no d'oh !

29. Favorite Dessert/Sweet?

Anything that looks/smells/tastes/is called *Chocolate*

30. How many tabs are turned on in ur browser right now?

Facebook, Blogger, Gmail, Google (in case i want to spell check :P)

31. Favorite Season?

Summer ^_^

32. If I come to your house now, what would u cook for me?

I can only make *dosas* cause my mom thinks my mom-in-law will atleast want me to know how to get those round crisp things off the pan :/

33. What is the right way to avoid people who purposefully hurt you?

i don't bother. Cause I know I'll get back some day.

34. What are you afraid of the most?

Escalators. And crowds. Like social gatherings :S

35. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?

"I think my nose piercing is the *BEST* thing that ever happened to my face"

36. What brings a smile on your face instantly?

Free food, the mention of Australia, a clutter-less room, knowing that I'm looking sweet (=D) and seeing people I want to see!

37. A word that you say a lot?

How am i supposed to know if you are the listener? :|

Do i need to wake you up in case you zzzZZZzzzz-ed? :S

I hereby tag:

Lavender, Disguise, The Me, Remya, Sulagna and anyone who is jumping around to do this one :)

Love!

My Hair.

I have hair on my head. I am very grateful.

I call my hair "MY HAIR". They loved being called MY HAIR.

They are black. They are curly. They are short. They are messed up at all times.

I like my hair, mostly. When I don't like my hair, I cut them.

I cut my own hair. With scissors. I like cutting my own hair.

I tie my hair up. I dont leave them. I dont like them falling. I dont like them getting lost.

But, my hair, they don't like me. They mostly are grumpy and sad.

They mostly celebrate bad hair days. I don't like them celebrating these bad hair days.

When I get angry at them, I don't comb them. I never comb my hair. Never.

They like oil, shampoo, conditioner, mousse very much. I like them but. Its a love triangle.

I try very hard to win their love. I blog about them. I blog about them. And I blog about them.

But they don't know nothing about blogger.

Sometimes they make me look pretty. V Pretty. I love my hair. V much.

Do you love yours?

Colour.

A brush.

Some bottles of paint.Some tubes that'v been twisted.

Dry paint.

Drops of water.

The palette splattered with colour.

A cloth stained with colour.

Colours. Red Green Yellow Blue Black Crimson White Purple Navy Orange...

Lotsa cuts on my hand.

Blood that mixes with the Red...giving it a freaky personal touch?

A white sheet. Now drenched in colour. A riot of Colours.

I'm working on it.

I'm painting...

And I made THAT...that thing on the top, up there. How is it?!?! :f

The FIRST time I'v ever painted in my life (obviously after those silly drawing classes in school.)!!!!Click on the image to see a bigger version!

One beeeeeeeg hug for a compliment, a small forced hug for harsh criticism :P Love!

My Sexxxy People!

I am a bit odd in the head. You know, there are times when i am just normal. And then there are times when random things cross my mind and i start acting a beeeeet crazed up. Like in the last two days I read two three bloggers go yadda yadda yadda about their saga of not being able to write anymore (okay, uhm, i din't intend to sound the way you think i sound.) so ya, and then last night, i couldn't sleep. I had my anthropology exam in exactly 6 hours and there i was, wondering if i can still write or not...why? cause my alter ego reminded me that i hadn't updated my blog for the past 5 days and there IS a possiblity that i might have developed the oh-i-can-nomore-write syndrome in 5 days. 120 hours. Oh don't look at me. It was my alter ego. Anyway, the first thing i do after i come home, jab the keyboard furiously. Think. Type. Erase. Get Angry. Furious. Type some more. Erase some more more. Get angry some more more more. Shut eyes. THINK. TYPE. ERASE. And then, get bored. Yawn. Stretch. Calmly get up n go to the kitchen. Break open a packet of Hide-n-Seek and munch on biscuit after biscuit. Who cares man if i can write or not! When the brain wants to think, type and hit the post button, it will. Its like saying 'Don't teach daddy how to fuck' ??

Moral of the post: BingoBoomBaamDhoomDhamDhishum! i CAN write. So ya, you still have a lot of rubbish coming you'r way, my child, before I retire *coughs like an old lady* (CLAP. the speech is over =/)

*goes away dancing. tapori dance.*